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May 28, 2012
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No one would have called him perfect but...

Journal Entry: Mon May 28, 2012, 10:41 PM
On Sunday morning my father, old iron sides, died of pneumonia. No one would have called him perfect, and he would be the first to admit that.   To me though, he was one of the meanest, toughest nuts you could have ever met and in the end, he has a legacy that needs stated....

My father was heavily addicted to alcohol  and tobacco for most of his life. And they had taken huge tolls on the most important relationships his life and the relationship between my father and I was not spared.  There was along time my father and I didn't speak to each other. Eventually those addictions took their pound of flesh from my Dad.  About 12 or 13 years ago, he was struck down by a series of strokes and left in a wheel chair with the use of only one arm.  Unable to take care of himself, me and my siblings attempted to keep him out of the system.  However, after struggling for many years, in the end it didn't last.  We finally had to put him in a nursing home, where he could have access to proper facilities and where proper medical care was close to him.

  Eventually I grew and my father changed. We were able to start to reconcile. And as I have become a husband, a father and a provider I started to better understand my father and the gifts he had given me.  His words may have seemed small, his lessons may have seemed pointless at the time. But my father did live life with certain principles. Certain ideas that he planted in my mind that I truly believe, would they have not been said, I would not be the man I am today.  I would never have accomplished what I have or dream like i do.  

My father made me a dreamer, made me a hard worker and taught me to never ever.... EVER give up my my dreams. 

And for that Dad I thank you.  I will continue to live by those principles and your  legacy will be passed onto my son.

I love you and will always miss you.

Your son Jeff

  • Listening to: my baby laugh
  • Watching: A computer screen...
Add a Comment:
 
:iconphilbourassa:
philbourassa Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Sorry for your loss, Jeff. I'm sure your father was proud of you.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
I think he was, thanks Phil...
Reply
:icont-blan:
T-blan Featured By Owner Jun 9, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
My condolences.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thank you!
Reply
:iconpachycrocuta:
Pachycrocuta Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2012
My condolences, sir. I'm glad you were able to make peace with him at some level.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
As am I... thank you for the kind words!
Reply
:iconstubbedtoe:
StubbedToe Featured By Owner Jun 1, 2012
Jeff,
You honor him greatly by this post and by the man you have become.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thanks, that's what I was hoping to do...
Reply
:iconmechangel2002:
mechangel2002 Featured By Owner May 30, 2012  Professional Traditional Artist
:hug: My condolences.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thank you!
Reply
:iconkidneytheft:
KidneyTheft Featured By Owner May 30, 2012  Professional Traditional Artist
wow thats sad. so sorry bro. best wishes.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thanks dude...
Reply
:iconkidneytheft:
KidneyTheft Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Traditional Artist
no prob big J. sorry again
Reply
:iconairtightleek:
AirtightLeek Featured By Owner May 30, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
It sounds like he taught you to live and be. I'd call that nothing other than perfection
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
I would have to agree in a lot of ways... thank you...
Reply
:iconchadthx1138:
ChadTHX1138 Featured By Owner May 30, 2012  Professional Filmographer
You're living my worst fears. so sorry to hear buddy. I'm deeply saddened to hear of your loss.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thanks for the kind words!
Reply
:iconrockhurtz:
RockHurtz Featured By Owner May 30, 2012  Hobbyist Filmographer
My condolences to you and your family Jeff. I had a very similar relationship with my father, my father passed almost a year ago. Just like you i choose to focus on the good times we had together. It is nice that you had the opportunity to reconcile with your father, i had the same experience with my father.

I know it leaves you feeling strange, regretful at times but thankful for the good parts.

All the best to you and your family.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Good for you ... I know I have many a relative that won't and didn't take the opportunity to make it a good thing. That will be a heavy burden to carry for the rest of their lives...

Thanks for the encouraging words!
Reply
:iconjeffreymunoz:
jeffreymunoz Featured By Owner May 30, 2012  Professional General Artist
May he watch over you.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Hoping so...
Reply
:iconisaacanim:
isaacanim Featured By Owner May 30, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
My Condolences
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thank you!
Reply
:icongenekelly:
genekelly Featured By Owner May 29, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
My condolences about your father. Good for you for looking to the positive in all this. I'm sure you've made him very proud.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
I think and hope I have. Thanks dude!
Reply
:iconchaunceypierce:
ChaunceyPierce Featured By Owner May 29, 2012  Professional Filmographer
I'm sorry for your loss and I wish you and your family well during this time. I know what you're going through as I've lost both of my parents. It's not easy, but you will get through this and come out stronger.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
I think I already am.. thanks for the kind words!
Reply
:iconchaunceypierce:
ChaunceyPierce Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Your welcome :)
Reply
:iconcjz:
CJZ Featured By Owner May 29, 2012
I'm sorry for your loss. Your tribute to him was honest and heartfelt.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thank dude, I appreciate it.
Reply
:iconjosephdif:
JosephDiF Featured By Owner May 29, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Sorry to hear about your father.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thank you...
Reply
:iconseanwthornton:
seanwthornton Featured By Owner May 29, 2012
My condolences. Sounds like a great father.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
In a lot of ways he was. Thank you!
Reply
:icontigerhawk01:
Tigerhawk01 Featured By Owner May 29, 2012  Professional Filmographer
My condolences, a touching post.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thanks for the kind words!
Reply
:icontigerhawk01:
Tigerhawk01 Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Your welcome.
Reply
:iconvoya:
voya Featured By Owner May 29, 2012  Professional General Artist
I'm so sorry for your loss Jeff. Best wishes to you and your family. Take care my friend.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thank you!
Reply
:iconmattkaufenberg:
MattKaufenberg Featured By Owner May 29, 2012
So sorry to hear about your dad, Jeff! My dad passed away almost a year ago and it's not an easy thing. As a dad, it's especially hard knowing your kids won't get to know their grandpa like they should have. My prayers go out to you and your family.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
It is hard, but I am hoping to take his lesson(s) and mistakes and turn them into positives. Perhaps even be there for my grandchildren... thanks for the kind words!
Reply
:iconl1ghtgoddess:
L1ghtGoddess Featured By Owner May 29, 2012  Hobbyist
Thank you for sharing this with us. You have my sympathies, and best wishes for your family.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thanks for the kind words!
Reply
:iconjuanstewart:
juanstewart Featured By Owner May 29, 2012
Thanks for sharing Jeff, my sincere condolences goes out to you and your family.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thanks dude!
Reply
:iconestivador:
estivador Featured By Owner May 29, 2012
my condolences. i think i understand the first part of relationship, koz i had the same problems with my father too. but i khow i had learn a lot of god stuffs with him too. my condolences again, and peace o/
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Thank you and here's to hoping you and your father find the peace!
Reply
:iconseanmcfarland:
SeanMcFarland Featured By Owner May 29, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
My condolences. It takes a great deal of courage and humility to move past the pain that can be inflicted by family. These relationships can be so complex, and often so challenging that reconciliation is a rarity. It speaks to your and your siblings character that despite a tumultuous past, you pulled together, and ultimately achieved some sort of peace and understanding with your father. That's a step not everyone could have taken, and I am certain your father is glad that you did.
Reply
:iconjeffwamester:
jeffwamester Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2012  Professional Filmographer
It is, and I have many a sibling that have not gotten past it yet. I hope they do. It is a good place to be when one does. Thanks for the kind word and thoughtful condolences!
Reply
:iconsardaukar007:
Sardaukar007 Featured By Owner May 29, 2012
You have my condolences. I lost my father a few weeks ago, and while it sounds I had a much closer relationship with mine than you did with yours, the loss is incredibly painful and powerful regardless.
Reply
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